"Do not ask for more than you can give," this is the most straightforward rule underlying any interpersonal relationship. Think about what you offered in the reverse affinity, when it was the last time you left your comfort zone to empathize with the other. And after that, you can judge the other, when the mathematical balance confirms you are winning, only then you have the right to ask for justification.
We always look for the human mirrors that reflect us in the most beautiful way possible, the mirrors that reflect us as close as possible to the ideal image we have created for ourselves.
When such a mirror (which you invested in faithfully) does not reflect you the way you want it, stop and ask yourself the following question: Are you ambiguous and unclear or can the mirror now reveal your hiding places and shadows too?